I am a fraud.
Why? I plan to work after I retire (early). Scandalous!
How Do You Define Retirement? Does “Work” Factor in?
If you believe any of the content in these pages, you know how much I despise cubicle life. In my opinion, escaping the cubicle is priority one. Continuing to be productive with creative pursuits is priority two.
After all, we’ve got five rental properties to manage. One might argue that I can’t possibly take care of those domiciles without stressful work involved. And sure, I’ve got a decent paycheck now, but when I retire early, that paycheck goes POOF. And this blog doesn’t earn a six-figure income yet…
Slowly and ever so cautiously I’ve left bread crumbs about my financial situation. Sometimes I’m pretty clear about the big plan, and the details behind it. But unlike many other bloggers, I won’t reveal too much about our spending, our income, and blog traffic or blog income (snore).
My post on Monday was one where I “let it all hang out”, so to speak. It’s easy enough to see that we make a good income. Now in my mid-40s, and Mrs. Cubert is over ten years into her practice, we’ve become veterans in our fields.
Making good money isn’t something to apologize for, but I’m certainly aware of how difficult it is when you’re just starting. Heck, I remember my first real, salaried job out of undergrad way back in ’95: $27,500. And my pay didn’t exactly rocket-off from there in subsequent years.
Let’s see… For the heck of it, 8% annual 401K savings on $27,500 was $2,200. I think we had a 50% employer match for the first 6%, so in total, $3,025. The kernel of the snowball…
Fraud or not, I certainly hope that some of my experiences and side hustle real estate tips resonate. Maybe YOU can save some money while you focus on the important things in life, like people and personal growth. Now THAT is a revelation.
But what if I’m leading any of you fine readers astray? What if you take the bait, and put all of your faith into some foolish scheme to retire early. And it winds up being a trap?
That last line reminds me of Admiral Ackbar’s famous quote from Return of the Jedi. After all, this early retirement stuff is a T-R-A-P TRAP! I mean, in all dead honest seriousness, what if we don’t have healthcare when we turn 75? How will we afford the medical bills, if we get attacked by wolves on the way to the garage?
Or worse, a third Death Star, this time powered by Tesla, suddenly emerges on the horizon? I should suggest that you’re better off staying put in that cubicle, to avoid medical bills and wolves…
I truly believe working after retirement is A-OK because I want to avoid idle hands syndrome. I reckon I could be skiing, snorkeling, or playing slots all day. But writing blog posts? Managing rental properties? That’s work. And I thrive on it.
Jerks.
I’m Not as Frugal as I Could Be
As for my frugal side, well that’s nothing to brag about lately. I’ve been really bad this week. Three coffees at the on-campus coffee shop, and one lunch (or two) from the cafeteria. Send in the clowns.
Yes. Admittedly I’ve been a bit more relaxed about little things like buying coffee at Starbucks.
*In my defense, I’m still making some well-informed “big picture” moves. The Airbnb Experiment is churning along pretty well now. I’m about 60% to the goal for first-year returns. Speaking of churning, I’m onto my second bonus point travel card of 2018. Clap clap clap!
I know I should temper my enthusiasm for persuading you all to save money. Many will claim that the world is going to hell in a hand-basket, but I remain an optimist.
Your Move…
I’ve shared A LOT about what has worked for us in OUR journey. I use real examples. Heck, I even share when I fall flat on my face and fail. I’ve come close enough to my 1,000 word limit for today. I’m spent.
This blog is not intended to solve all of your financial problems. I’m not trying to tell you, parents of children with special needs, or families with extenuating circumstances, that early retirement is the cure-all for YOU. It may not cure much of anything for those with money either.
Yes, there are some tips and tactics here that could help your general financial health. That’s true regardless of whether you quit employment-at-will early.
What I write about here, and what many personal finance bloggers write about there, is specifically targeted to people who have no excuses. You know, people who can but don’t, who should but won’t, who would’ve, could’ve, but still find themselves locked in a cube at 60, counting the hours until tee-time on Saturday.
So don’t worry about plans you might have to keep working after you jettison your cubicle. This whole philosophy isn’t about giving up your productivity. No. It’s truly about finding the most enjoyable ways to channel your best work, in an environment that brings you joy, and not STRESS.
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🙂
Loved that one. You are almost out of the cubicle. That’s all that matters!
Thanks, Busy Mom! (I feel like I’m talking to my mom when I write that…) 🙂
Wait, wait wait! Reader number 005 here. Are you telling me that people who have no chance of retiring early or reaching financial independence should not read (AND WRITE) about FIRE? In that case, I join you in the fraud-club! Where should I resign?
Get out of your cubicle Neo! They (the early retirement police/agents) are coming for you!
PS: You brought a tear to my eye. If I would have spent that much time on learning languages than playing Pitfall I would be fluent in German or Python today.
005? I thought we lost you in the Sychelles! Welcome back, special agent. 😉
Newsflash: Absolutely. Do not read any personal finance blogs or pursue financial independence, because your experience may not exactly mirror mine, and I can’t trust you to make good decisions based on your own situation.
Thank you, and taking a bow,
Morpheus
You huckster you!
This is one of the funniest posts I’ve read in awhile. Loved it!
Your truly,
Reader #6
Reader #6! You came back!!! *sniff* I knew you couldn’t quit me…
Come back again soon. Please!!!!!
😉
hahaha, nice one Big C. You fraud!
But already +$27k in ’95, I was in high school at that time you old fart 😉
Just so you know, mate, my wife thinks you’re an old fart too. She was in Junior High at that time. :-O
Shoot, now I had to look up what the ages are for the various grades (different school system here)…..seems like your wife and I are of the same age! (does that still make me an old fart?) Guess I actually was in Junior high too 🙂
If you’re 35, you’ve nailed it. And if you’re the same age, then you’re so totally not an old fart!!!
Make that Reader #7! Anyone who treats a blog post as their “Bible” probably should stay put in their cubicle. Your down-to-earth dialogue is enlightening and offers others a look at how you will be able to retire early.
Agree! That just about sums up the whole theme behind today’s little rant! Thank you, Susan Bee (Anthony?)
As one of your 6 readers, I’m really ticked off at that guy who wrote the opening of this post. You’re our hero, Cubert. Flaws and all. Hilarious post.
Fritz, you must be reader #1, cuz you’re number #1 in my book! 🙂
Thanks for the kind words. And watch out for those rogue death stars next time you’re swimming across Lake of the Ozarks.
Random thoughts. You are looking good at Zion dude! In 1986, my first job out of undergrad paid $21K. That’s inflation for you. Tom
Heck yeah! To add insult to injury, that sweatshirt shrunk after the first wash. $21K? You make me feel like a winner, Tom! 🙂
Six readers? You’ve got more than six comments!
There’s only so much we can relay about ourselves in each and every post. If someone reads one post of mine and gets mad because my income is quadruple his and that makes me a fraud, too, that reader isn’t getting the whole picture. If I qualified everything I said or recommended with statements about my past and privilege, every post read like one big disclaimer.
I’d rather read about wolves and Musk’s Death Star than a bunch of qualifying statements. But I am writing one post to “come clean”, combining the various tidbits about myself and my blog that I’ve mentioned in dozens of places and put them all in one place for the world to see. I’d hate to be considered a huckster.
Cheers!
-PoF
See there, my 10ish readers? MATH!!! It works!!! 😉
Hey PoF! Credit to you. Much of this post was inspired by your comment over on ONL yesterday. In fairness, we need to put the occasional disclaimer out there to avoid making it seem easier than it may really be for some.
You’re no huckster, not by a long shot. In fact, I’d argue you’ve got more than 10ish readers, and many of them have benefited immensely from your well-written advice and anecdotes. We keep on rollin’…
Good job keeping the numbers real. I think most FIRE people have a desire to do something in post-FI life, but it is good not to paint a false picture for people following.
Also, I don’t count as a reader, I’m illegitimate so I can’t read. 🙂
Your comment makes you legit in my eyes, Bob! 🙂
Wow, sounds like someone really dumped on you. I’ve heard it’s an occupational hazard for bloggers. It’s the number one reason why I choose not to blog, especially as I’ve heard, anecdotally, that women are subjected to more attackes than men – I would never be able to withstand the personal attacks. But I do like reading others’ blogs. I really admire the bloggers that put themselves out there. And I want you to know that your blog, and all the other FIRE blogs, are enormously helpful to someone like me who is trying to do this without any flesh and blood supporters.
Nah. No one came after me. Just felt like being a little snarky today.
I’m really glad you find this blog helpful. That helps keep the fires burning, Veronica. Thank you!
Whoa there buddy – I wouldn’t say anyone has specifically had it out for you there. And $100/mo of blogging income is very different than “living on” 4% of your investments when you’re pulling 4 figures of blog income a month.
As far as health goes, I exercise and eat right most of the time, but alas, neither of those stopped me from going partially deaf.
And in 1995 I was still in elementary school 😉
I dunno, Angela. That guy in the intro paragraph might just be a PI from the dreaded Retirement Police. (*sirens / flashers*)
No argument here on my meager blog income vs. those raking in 4 figures a month. I was just being transparent, so no one thought I was setting them up for that Pitfall quicksand.
My points about health were aimed at those who make *no effort* and later wind up with all sorts of issues. I happen to have an auto-immune condition, but I’ll be danged if I let myself fall apart due to laziness or gluttony.
Again, the point of all this is that there is no “one size fits all” approach. Someone who reads Mr. Money Mustache should take away the points that allow him or her to live on $24K a year, and not “ooh, if I blog, I can make a million a year!” The fact that it took almost 10 years AFTER he retired, to start earning anything material on his blog should be kept in mind.
Ah, 1995. To be 22 again, and know a sh*t or two about money!!! 🙂
So much drama in the LBC…… Go forth and prosper.
Those two phrases do NOT go together. But okay! 🙂
(Love you, man!)
One of the funniest posts I’ve seen in a while! Plus who can not like the inclusion of Pitfall. In all seriousness, not sure which reader number remains unclaimed but I say let the haters party by themselves.
Hey FTF! Many thanks for those kind words. This was one of the few posts where I just kinda “went for it”. Maybe I need to do that more often. You know, go off script a little?
Hahaha love it.
Hey you must have more than 6 readers if you make $100 a month. I hope you get some good glasses with your after retirement vision plan, or did you already laser eye surgery, you big fraud!!!
Jk jk jk.
But seriously, Gen X work really hard compared to Gen Y (I am Gen Y myself) so you deserve to abandon your cubicle!
Laser surgery is scheduled for next month. Wish me luck!!!
I’d be interested to hear more about why Gen X work is harder than Gen Y work. That is really intriguing to me. Thanks, GYM!
There’s really nothing wrong with doing some work in retirement Cubert, the only difference is that it won’t have to be a 9-5 monotonous slog and, more importantly, it will be on your terms!
Hi Ben! Very adroit comment. Spot flippin’ on. Boiling it all down, retirement is simplest when defined as “escape from the rat race.”
That made me laugh. I don’t talk about myself much on my blog. Can’t see its anyone’s business, and if I told you how much I made it would make your nose bleed.
Keep up the blog-crushing income stream! You’re an inspiration!
I’m glad, AoF! And yeah, I get the sense that those of us who’ve worked the cubes for a decade or two have reached a higher level of income. Though I’m betting your actuarial field is at least 2x what I pull. Math nerd. 🙂
Wow somebody sure must have peed in your Cheerios this morning!
Thanks for the chuckle.
I’m just disappointed that you turn out to be one of those elitist minted bloggers living fat and happy off the gullible bluehost commissions of all us less successful bloggers.
Don’t you realise how privileged you are, high rolling on your princely 3 figure monthly income? Spare a thought for all those PF bloggers out there who don’t have the advantages that 6 readers bring with it! Where will they get their Personal Capital signup commissions from? Have you no shame man!?
Those struggling bloggers are slaving away in their cubicles on meagre IT engineer and hedge fund manager salaries while evangelise about a path to early retirement that they themselves have not yet taken. The horror!
Instead of empathising with their plight you are humblebragging about being dropping $20 on a disposable sweatshirt while posing for your Instagram designer lifestyle post photo.
Shame Cuthbert, shame.
Never! I’m proud of my elitist blogger status! I’m on track to pull at least FOUR Siteground referral bonuses this year, man! Top it!
Deep breathes… What’s Personal Capital? Some fancy replacement for free spreadsheets? 😉
So, Kurtz, that sweatshirt cost me $28 on CLEARANCE. Thanks to National Park pricing.
Sorry, what’s Instagram? Is that some son of Facebook tunnel from Red Square into our living rooms?
– Ignorant, and shamed. I’m logging off.
Love,
Cuthbert.
I’ve been fairly lucky with trolls but admit that I’m probably in a bad position to deal with their criticisms. I tend not to really bounce back from hatred on the internet, for whatever reason.
The closer I get to FI, the less sure I am I even want to leave my WAH/cubicle job. I find there’s more meaning and satisfaction in my career as money is taken off the table more and more. I really not retire for a while!
That’ll keep those trolls at bay, I bet. 😉
Well, this wasn’t a troll. It was just my own personal Hyde going after Dr. Jeckyll. Inspired by some of the buzz on the wire about bloggers not coming clean on their true total income.
I’m probably at the opposite end of the spectrum – as FI approaches, I’m more convinced than ever how I need to be done with the monkey business. Maybe I’ll throttle back if they allow a part time situation, but that doesn’t thrill me either. Time will tell, as will this blog!
You’re telling me you make $1.67 to do this!
What a sell out!
I guess it is up to me to keep up the FREE 99 advice everyone else is obviously cashing in to buy their mansions.
I’ve got two kids to feed! (said like the cab driver in “Total Recall”) 🙂
Haha your title got me… jk!
I like the $100 a month, clearly blogging for many (myself included) is about connecting and providing perspective! Keep it up!
That $100 and all the rest is going straight to charity too. 🙂
Thanks for stopping by, Josh!
PS – Great work getting your Twitter following so dang high! Nice!!